I waste paper.

Avery’s second birthday is coming up (holy shit shit shit I’m about to have a two year old) and since I like to overdo everything I decided to make invitation by hand. I scrutinized jungle-themed scrapbook paper and cardstock. I studied the 3-D stickers and looked for the perfect envelopes. I am not a fan of crafting or scrapbooking and in my opinion all of those cutesie papers are totally overpriced.

Like I said, that’s just my opinion. They’re like assholes, you know.

Thanks to no longer having any free time it took me about three days to complete my gloriously hand-crafted creations. And you know what? They look AWESOME.

Now what the hell do I do with them? The party is in two-ish weeks so I don’t have anymore time to spare and I don’t have stamps. After all of my hard work guess what I’m going to do – send out e-vites. No shit.

I only do paper invitations since my grandparents don’t have email (get on it, Betty and Lucille) and that’s just silly. I can call them and not waste paper or a fucking stamp.

Anyway, I love wasting what little free time I have on craft projects that are never going to get used. Awesome.